What to Do When Y'all See Someone You Know on Tinder

I saw a longtime friend on Tinder recently. One time I got over the stupor of seeing a motion-picture show in which he has a visible penis line (and the shock of realizing he's the kind of guy who posts visible-penis-line pictures on dating apps), I laughed and swiped correct. Nosotros matched. "HAHAHAHAHA hi hottie," I said. He replied with three cat-with-hearts-for-eyes emoji. The adjacent time I saw him, nosotros laughed near it. And then he made a pass at me.

I idea we'd swiped right in a sort of friendly, mutual acquittance — the equivalent of waving howdy across a crowded bar when we are both busy flirting with other people. Just he thought the wave itself was a flirtation, that my right swipe indicated a desire to add "benefits" to our friendship. I'd given positive feedback after seeing his penis line, afterward all.

Though online dating's been around for a while, the etiquette around information technology is still evolving. (And now that Tinder has introduced a Snapchat-like photo-sharing function, the stakes are higher than ever!) And then, later inspecting my ain habits and questioning others almost theirs, I've concluded that in that location are 6 main strategies for reacting to a familiar face on an online dating app.

1. The Wave-Hello Right Swipe: This is one of the more than pop default choices betwixt friends, due mostly to the gleeful novelty of running into a buddy in an unexpected place. An unspoken (or barely spoken) acknowledgment created by swiping right on Tinder or Swivel, rating someone with five stars on OKCupid, or simply clicking and viewing their profiles in apps where you lot can view lists of "visitors." "If it'due south a friend, I presume he doesn't want to blindside me, because we would have washed it by at present," my friend Maya explained. "And then usually we're all 'hahaha hiiii.' If nosotros actually desire to fuck, we'll effigy information technology out another time."

The wave hello becomes a trouble but when you're interacting with someone who is not waving hello. Someone who is engaged in activeness like …

2. The Narcissistic Right Swipe: Because I am extremely curious and ruthlessly self-centered when it comes to dating, I right-swipe everyone I recognize on Tinder. I want to know if they think I'k beautiful! This is a cruel tactic that confuses people and unfairly toys with their hearts, and I freely admit that if I met a homo who admitted to doing this, I'd call him a douchebag and hate him. And nonetheless, I would right-swipe.

Narcissistic correct-swipers have one of 3 options when they "match" with people they know in real life and don't actually like: 1, block them immediately if you truly hate them. Ii, ignore messages or bit strategically if you need plausible deniability. Iii, feel so guilty that yous cease upward going on a cord of clashing dates "just to run into." All iii options are horrid and inexcusable, but love is a battlefield and sometimes it's every bitch for herself.

3. The Principled Avoider: Though "I never date people I piece of work with and/or live near and/or share friends with" tends to exist an alibi, it is truthful that some people categorically avoid known quantities when dating online. Sometimes this is to avoid entanglement. Other times, information technology is a simple acknowledgment that, if you liked each other enough to date, you lot'd exist doing it already. You're dating online to meet new people, not the same sometime ones, correct? Men who already had (and perhaps messed upwardly) their chances with you must go, in the words of Beyoncé, "to the left, to the left." You can take another him in a minute, with the help of vast online databases of eligible men.

4. The Nervous Avoider: Other times, avoidance is driven by fear. What if you lot both swipe right, but don't know what to say? What if you lot date, but it doesn't work out, and it's awkward for the rest of your lives? Dating is socialization gone nuclear — powerful but explosive. "I saw this guy from college on OKCupid, and fifty-fifty though I SO SO So wanted to click, I couldn't permit myself," a female person friend said in a Gchat. "He was in a lower social strata than me in college, and if he saw me in his 'visitors' list, it would lower me to his strata and I can't deal with that." Unmarried and unlucky in honey, she needs to cling to something.

5. The Screen-Grabber: Whatever of the above options may be combined with screen-grabbing, usually for gossip purposes. (Or to text it to the person in question, as a variation on the "wave hello" right-swipe.) Screen-grabbing is a little cruel — we are all at our nigh vulnerable when advertising romantic availability online — but, ultimately, not then different than garden-multifariousness dating gossip. Hell hath no fury like a girl whose BFF comes across her ex-boyfriend's online dating profile only fails to take a screenshot.

6. The Person Who Doesn't Play Games and Actually Swipes Correct to Indicate Sexual and/or Romantic Interest: Earlier my emoji-cat friend made a laissez passer at me, I'd assumed this blazon of person did not exist. When using apps that treat dating like a game, is it even possible to cutting the game-playing and relate to one another in hostage? Can a preexisting friendship blossom into something more, with the help of an app designed for superficial hookups?

"Hither'southward the affair," my visibly penised friend said. "You tin't wait at someone you know on Tinder and non recall virtually fucking them, if only for a carve up 2nd." And though we didn't hook up immediately, one time the idea had been planted in both of our minds, well, eventually, nosotros tested information technology.

When You Run Into Someone You Know on Tinder